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Passive Is Passion by ~itaichan:iconitaichan:

Categories Literature > Poetry > Romantic > Mature Romance > Fixed




Torched serene, tattered soul
Her blank stark eyes reflected coal
Remaining: only broken dreams
Of love once sought for joyous means
But there he left her thoughtlessly
Her hope all lost with churning sea
The joy withheld for endless time
Came and went; deminished crime
Her selfless soul possesed by sin
Egged the blade into her skin
What once was dreamt of soon was hate
Her soulful desire, a love, to create
Thoughts left behind, forgotten still
Lifeless laid her; stuttered trill
The passioned heart had lost its will
And passed into a crimson kill...
©2005-2009 ~itaichan
:iconitaichan:

Author's Comments

For this poem I tried to create a really depressing atmosphere and I think I suceeded! I'm not quite sure what happened to me to make me write it, because I have no experience in this field emotion, but, I still think it's one of my favorites..lol..

Comments


love 0 0 joy 0 0 wow 0 0 mad 0 0 sad 0 0 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0
:iconwarri0rp0et:
~Warri0rP0et Jan 23, 2005, 6:23:35 PM
Wow, that is really good. And trust me, I'm not like all of these phony "critics" who think any poem with the word "crimson" in it must be a knock-out. I really think the poem was a joy to read. Typically, I don't like incredibly emotive poems that tell the reader how to feel rather than invoke emotion in them, but I really think you did both here. Great job.

--
Mic

"I can show you fear in a handful of dust."
:iconichigogamu:
~ichigogamu Jan 23, 2005, 6:33:51 PM
:clap: very good!!

--
Wonder Twin Powers- ACTIVATE!
:iconitaichan:
~itaichan Jan 23, 2005, 6:35:44 PM
woooo, thanx! i'm glad you enjoyed! and glad you had something to say...i felt really good about writing this poem...^^ :clap: YEY!

--
[Hopeless Romantics United] H.R.U! NOW LETS MAKE HRU NOISES! HRRRRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! I LOVE YOU TELOKA! <333333333

"The fear of being crap, I think, is always what makes you good..." - Ewan
:iconitaichan:
~itaichan Jan 23, 2005, 6:42:48 PM
wow ichi...you really are creative with your comments...lol...^^, thanx though! oh, and lovely little siggy there...YOU COFFEE SEDUCER YOU!

--
[Hopeless Romantics United] H.R.U! NOW LETS MAKE HRU NOISES! HRRRRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! I LOVE YOU TELOKA! <333333333

"The fear of being crap, I think, is always what makes you good..." - Ewan
:iconichigogamu:
~ichigogamu Jan 23, 2005, 6:49:28 PM
yea i'm a coffee seducer....

and i'm know i'm not the best at being a critic.. 'specially on poems....

--
Wonder Twin Powers- ACTIVATE!
:iconartsychic27:
~artsychic27 Jan 23, 2005, 7:49:39 PM
WOW!!!!!!!! TOTALLY AWSOME! by fare on of ur best, it really spoke to me! lol love it! great :petting: u seem depressed

--
*The Pencil is Mightier then the Sword because no matter what anyones says it still hurts to get stabbed with a Pencil!*
:iconitaichan:
~itaichan Jan 24, 2005, 3:03:21 PM
lmao, actually, i'm a very optimistic person...i just like writing depressing situations...^^ i admit i have my days and undergo tons of stress, but I am pretty happy person! and thanx! It's one of my favorites of the ones i've written...YEY! *dances in circles*

--
[Hopeless Romantics United] H.R.U! NOW LETS MAKE HRU NOISES! HRRRRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! I LOVE YOU TELOKA! <333333333

"The fear of being crap, I think, is always what makes you good..." - Ewan
:iconartsychic27:
~artsychic27 Jan 24, 2005, 5:47:37 PM
lol yeah i wish i was a happier person! lol so im happy that ur happy~! but i still love ur work! :D i wrote a poam today but its not very god but i think im going to put it on DA! :D

--
*The Pencil is Mightier then the Sword because no matter what anyones says it still hurts to get stabbed with a Pencil!*
:icongracie16:
*gracie16 Jan 26, 2005, 3:15:45 PM
good job..... Poe would be proud of that one...

--
gallery--[link]

"The man in Black fled across the desert, and the gunslinger followed"
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January 23, 2005
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